Baked Chips, the downfall of society?

TheFoodAss | General | Monday, September 11th, 2006

I may have ranted on this one before, but I am gonna lay it all out here scientific like.

Baked chips are completely disgusting, and highlight all that is wrong with Americans, and food.

Lets start off with a little comparison, a bag of plain kettle cooked chips, and plain baked chips.

In this corner, Baked Lays brand chips:

120 calories per ounce, 7 ingredients, and absolutely no taste whatsoever.

In this corner, Cape Cod brand kettle cooked chips. (Although, I have noticed most kettle chips to have similar ingredients and nutritional information)

150 Calories per ounce, 3 ingredients and a magical salty satisfying flavor that’s to die for. Certainly worth eating.

So, in my comparo, baked chips weigh in at 120 belly busting calories per ounce, exactly 30 calories per ounce less than traditional, deep-fried, potato chips. 30… 30 fricken calories. Yes, the baked chips have less fat too, but we dont worry about that because we arent excess fat eating sloths, and can handle a little fat. So, by eating the baked chips, we give up all the taste for a 30/cal reduction… Hmm, we MIGHT even be forced to eat a few more chips to satisfy our salty-snack hunger.. At 12 calories/chip it only takes 3 extras to equal our divine kettle cooked choice.

What I am trying to say here, is that “light” food is a sham. You give up a miniscule amount of calories, and at the same time, you lose taste, satiation and natural goodness. It gets replaced by bland, corporate modified food starch potato wanna be’s and it’s downright wrong. Wrong and digusting.

I am sure some people are disheartened by the baked chips lack of taste, and may even move into the “flavored” varieties. Let’s take a look at the “Cheddar and Sour Cream” choice. Certainly a good way to make up for the loss of flavor, and still lose my 30 calories, right?

Holy yipes! Look at those ingredients…! (Oh, and they are “Naturally Baked”… rofl)
Now, instead of natural fried flavor with 3 ingredients you get:

  • 30 less calories
  • Monosodium Glutamate
  • Scary Hydrogenated Oils
  • Other freaky corporate concoctions

You see what I am trying to get at here? Eat the natural, awesome, kettle chips (or any other natural chips, some of those olive oil chips are amazing). Enjoy the natural potato flavor, and dont eat too much of anything. You wont get fat, you will be happier, and you just might help yourself to avoid the big cancer or crazy digestive problems a little.

What pisses me off most about this, is that “light food” is taking over my life. I have no choice at Subway besides baked crap chips, or flavored crap chips. Not a single “natural” choice…. and I dont eat subs without chips. Hey Jimmy Jons.. Whats up?


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